Staying on Track: Maria

On Monday we had our now monthly meeting of our lunchtime diet group and it was great to see everyone again!  Even better was when after everyone weighed in, we were able to report that each and every single one has either maintained their weight loss or gone on to lose more.  They have all made real changes in their thinking and in their behavior. They’ve adopted a whole new eating lifestyle and have the skills and confidence necessary to keep this lifestyle up. 

Maria, for example, knew she was going to a barbeque last weekend. Before she went, she sat down and thought about her food options.  They were:

1) Eat before she went in case there wasn’t any food there she could eat

2) Plan to eat at the barbeque, but know that she would have to be satisfied with smaller portions because the food was likely to more caloric then what she normally eats

3) Bring some food with her that she knows she will enjoy and feel satisfied with.

 

Maria chose the third option.  Because she knew she would be tempted by the sight and smell of hotdogs, she brought with her some low fat hotdogs that she’s had in the past and knows she enjoys.  She also brought some fruit for dessert in case there wasn’t any there, so she wouldn’t be tempted to go for cake or pie.  Maria went into the barbeque with the clear plan of eating exactly what she brought and nothing else, and didn’t struggle at all to stick to this plan.

How did she do it?  First of all Maria took the time to sit down and plan a strategy for the barbeque. If she hadn’t done so, she likely would have just gone with the intention of finding something there that she could eat, and probably would have ended up going over her calorie limit for the day.  Second, she brought food that was comparable to what was being served, so not only did she feel completely satisfied because she got to eat a good meal, but also she didn’t feel deprived because she was basically eating what everyone else was eating.  Third, Maria read her Advantages List (discussed on Day 1 of The Beck Diet Solution) before she went to remind herself why it was so important to her to stick to her plan.  Fourth, Maria has truly learned the skill of telling herself, “No Choice” (discussed on Day 13 of The Beck Diet Solution). She no longer lets herself even entertain the thought of going off her plan, and therefore no longer struggles to stay on it.

All of these things took time and lots of practice for Maria to master, but now that she has these skills, they come easily and naturally to her. 

Dieters Helping Dieters

During our diet group this week, we wanted to have our dieters benefit from each others’ wisdom.  Brenda began by talking about a sticky situation she found herself in over Mother’s Day.  That morning she was extremely busy so she skipped breakfast, and by the time she got to her planned Mother’s Day brunch, she was starving.  Brenda started out well, by eating the chicken and salad she had planned, but then when she was offered a hamburger, she ended up eating it – while standing up. 

Maria, our champion of “putting yourself first” (discussed on Day 8 of The Beck Diet Solution), gave Brenda the following advice:  she started by reminding Brenda how crucial it is to eat breakfast 365 days a year. Even when she’s busy or stressed, Maria always makes time to eat breakfast because she knows that skipping it will only set herself up to overeat later in the day (Day 2). 

Maria also talked about how good she has gotten at turning down food that other people offer her.  Maria, herself, went to several of her family members’ houses this Mother’s Day, and was offered food at each one.  Because she had already eaten breakfast and knew what she was going to eat for lunch, Maria firmly turned down all offers of food and instead drank only coffee – and she felt great about doing so.  She didn’t let herself give into the sabotaging thought, “It’s ok to eat this because it’s a celebration.”  Maria reminded Brenda of how good and empowering it feels when you are strong and stick to your diet.

Lastly, Maria reminded Brenda that you can’t let yourself slip up on the basics, like eating everything slowly, while sitting down, and noticing every bite (Day 5).  Chances are if Brenda had forced herself to sit down and face the hamburger, she might have been able to really notice what she was doing and talk herself out of eating unplanned food. 

Philadelphia Daily News: Maria

We are so excited that one of our wonderful dieters, Maria, was featured today in an article in the Philadelphia Daily News.  Maria, who has currently lost 57 pounds, credits her success to true changes in her thinking and behavior.  She now consistently does so many things that she never used to do, such as:

1. She always makes sure that she has the right foods in the house that she needs to stay on her diet.

2. She doesn’t worry about spending a little extra on the food she needs, because she knows it’s worth it to be thinner. 3. She always eats slowly while sitting down, and tries to enjoy every bite.

4. She doesn’t let her husband or children distract her from getting her exercise done.

5. She reads her Advantages List before going into a situation she knows could be difficult.

6. When going to a party or celebration, she always plans ahead what food she will eat, or how to get the food she will want to eat.

7. She checks restaurant menus online before going out to eat and decides ahead of time, so she doesn’t get tempted by other things on the menu.

8. She understands that she is making lifestyle changes. She recognizes that she isn’t on a temporary diet.

9. She doesn’t make exceptions in her eating, such as eating more because it’s a special occasion.

10. She doesn’t have ‘good’ foods and ‘bad’ foods, because she knows she can work anything into her diet, as long as she plans it.

11. She consistently gives herself credit for all of her positive diet and exercise-related behaviors, so that she continues to build her confidence and sense of control.

We are so proud of Maria and look forward to following her continued success!

Priorities: Maria

One skill that Maria has gotten very good at is putting herself first – making sure that she continually has the time and energy for diet and exercise (discussed on Day 8 of The Beck Diet Solution).  For Maria this particularly means making sure she keeps exercise a priority.  In the past, when her life got busy, exercise was always the first thing to fall off her plate. 

Maria exercises on a machine at home. When her kids interrupted her exercise in the past, she would always drop what she was doing and tend to them.  Now she tells them to wait until she’s done and then she helps them.  After dinner, if she’s already exercised, Maria may watch television with her husband. But if she hasn’t exercised yet, she nicely refuses to join him until she has finished.  Now she feels entitled to get her activities done first. 

Building this sense of entitlement is crucial to lasting weight loss because life always gets busy and things always come up.  If dieters don’t learn to put themselves first and ensure that they continually make diet and exercise a high priority, other factors will always get in the way of their best efforts.  Maria now knows that she is entitled to exercise because she deserves to be thinner and feel good about herself, and she is a good example for all of us. 

Standing Firm: Maria

It was Maria’s daughter’s birthday last week, so over the weekend Maria threw a sleepover party for her and her friends.  Maria knew that there would be a lot of tempting food around all evening and night and so she sat down ahead of time and planned out what and how much she would eat (discussed on Day 16 of The Beck Diet Solution).  Maria decided that the best way to approach this situation was to make sure she had lower calorie versions of the regular party food.  For herself she bought fat free hotdogs to eat instead of regular ones, a snack size bag of microwave popcorn instead of a buttery full-size bag, and 100-calorie packs of the same kind of cookies. 

For the most part everything went according to plan during the party.  Maria was able to enjoy her scaled-down version of the party food and didn’t feel deprived because she had prepared for the situation so well (Day 30).  However, there was one snag when Maria came face to face with a big bowl of gummy bears – a food she hadn’t anticipated wanting at all.  She suddenly developed a strong craving to eat them, and all at once the struggle started in her mind.  “It went back and forth,” Maria said, “like an angel and a devil on each shoulder.”  She had thoughts like, “It’s ok to eat the [unplanned] gummy bears because it’s a celebration; I really want it; it will just be one.”  She countered those sabotaging thoughts by telling herself, “It’s not ok to eat unplanned food.  Every time I eat something I’m not supposed to, it reinforces that bad habit.  Every time I resist unplanned food, it reinforces the good habit and increases the chance I will resist in the future.”  (Day 13). 

After a long struggle, Maria finally made the firm decision that she was absolutely not going to eat any gummy bears.  She went immediately to her refrigerator where she had posted her Advantages List (Day 1) and read it to remind herself of just why it was so important to her not to eat unplanned food.  As soon as the decision not to eat was made, Maria said that her craving immediately began to diminish and the urge to eat gummy bears eventually subsided.  This was an incredibly important experience for Maria because it showed her that cravings eventually pass and she doesn’t need to eat to get rid of them, and that she is strong and can be confident in the future of her ability to withstand uncomfortable cravings.

Slippage: Maria

During the group on Monday, we talked about the notion of “slippage” – letting bad habits infiltrate back into your life.  Setting in place new, helpful behaviors about diet and exercise takes time and energy, and the new habits and skills need to be practiced consistently to make sure the old ones don’t come creeping back (discussed on Day 42 of The Beck Diet Solution).

Maria noted that she was at risk for slippage when she was preparing her daughters’ lunches in the evening.  Several days in a row Maria caught herself popping an (unplanned) pretzel into her mouth as she was putting them into bags.  We discussed with Maria that while the number of calories in a pretzel is trivial, the act of absentmindedly eating unplanned food is not.  Today it could be a pretzel while preparing her daughters’ lunches, tomorrow it could be a brownie while talking on the phone (Day 16).  Also, while there are few calories in one pretzel, eating extra unplanned food every day while preparing lunch eventually would add up and could easily lead Maria to stop losing weight or even start gaining. 

Maria recommitted herself to not eating any unplanned food and to being extra alert when she was preparing food for others.  She stopped her slight slippage right at the onset, which will enable her to continue losing weight.

“If I hadn’t joined the group…”

We asked our diet group to complete the sentence, “If I hadn’t joined the group…” Here’s what they have to say about how the group, The Beck Diet Solution, and the techniques of Cognitive Therapy have helped them.

If I hadn’t joined the group…

Maria: “I would most likely have serious health problems and still would have been more than 44lbs heavier than I am today. I was becoming an introvert; I didn’t want anyone to see how fat I had become.”

Diana: “I would have gained 25 pounds.”

Brenda: “I would continue to try other fad diets and ultimately fail because I would not have learned behavior that would enable me to make conscious lifelong changes in my eating habits.”

Linda: “I would probably still be eating cheese steaks and chips and stopping by a fast food drive-thrus.”

Charlotte: “I would have continued putting on ~2 pounds/year for the rest of my life.”

Carolyn: “As a result of your weight loss group I have learned to take an active role in applying the following key words to my life: Decision – I have made a life-time decision to make positive food planning choices; Choice – I have learned that hunger is not an emergency and that I must practice “No Choice” on a daily basis; Lifestyle – Proper eating habits should be practiced as a way of lifefor the rest of my life; Maintain – Maintaining is worth the perpetual outcome it brings.  If I had not attended your weight loss group I really don’t believe that I would have the positive mind set that I have today. The phrase “Mind Set” being key.”

Breakfast in Bed: Maria

Maria had an interesting experience on Valentine’s Day: her young daughter woke her up by bringing her breakfast in bed.  In the past she would have immediately eaten everything her daughter brought both because she was pleased by her daughter’s efforts and because she viewed it as a celebration.  However, Maria is now so much more conscious of every bite that she takes (discussed on Day 3 of The Beck Diet Solution) that she didn’t immediately reach for the food. This situation presented an interesting problem for Maria: the breakfast of toast, bacon, and scrambled eggs her daughter brought her was certainly much more caloric than the light breakfast she had planned.  On the other hand, her daughter had gone through a lot of trouble to prepare it for her, and Maria didn’t want to discourage her. 

In general, we teach our dieters to learn to assertively say no to food pushers (Day 29), who usually come in the form of coworkers or family members urging treats.  In most cases, the cost of not eating the food (potentially minor disappointment to the food pusher) is far outweighed by the cost of eating it (dieters feel weak and controlled; they go off their plan; they may gain weight). 

Maria, who no longer has trouble resisting adults who urge food on her, realized that this truly was a special case.  So she employed the best strategy that she could – she mentally replanned her food for the day to include more calories for breakfast and fewer for lunch.  She then ate about half of what her daughter had prepared for her, which was enough to properly show her daughter her gratitude.  Maria followed her new plan for the rest of the day and as a result her higher calorie breakfast in bed did not affect her weight at all.

Getting Through Hard Times: Maria

Week 27 of our Diet Group and our dieters are finally returning to a normal schedule and putting the holiday season firmly behind them.  In our meeting on Monday we talked about the importance of preparing for the hard times.  Most of the time dieting is pretty easy and doesn’t take much effort.  But every once in a while it can get very difficult, due to a particularly strong craving (discussed in Day 13 of The Beck Diet Solution), a situation in which you can’t control the food, such as while traveling (Day 32), or being surrounded by tempting food, such as at a party or restaurant (Day 30).  It is for such times we are trying to prepare our dieters, so that they can be in these situations and handle them with relative ease.

Maria had a very hard week.  Her daughter was ill and so Maria has been up many nights tending to her. In addition to the stress of a sick child, Maria has also been very sleep-deprived.  Consequently, she found herself again having cravings for foods like cheese (a problem food for her in the past), which she hasn’t craved in a quite a while (Day 33).  “The cheese was literally calling out to me,” Maria says.  But did she answer the calling? “No, I knew it was just a craving and that I didn’t have to give into it,” Maria answered.  By labeling it a “craving” and differentiating it from actual hunger, Maria, even stressed and tired, was able to see that her desire wasn’t an emergency and she didn’t have to give into it (Day 11).  Maria reports that she held firm and didn’t eat any cheese, and is so happy that she kept her eating under control even in these stressful circumstances.  Maria lost 3 pounds this week.

Holiday Eating: Maria

Our Cognitive Therapy weight loss group has now been meeting for 6 months.  In spite of the fact that our dieters are faced with an overabundance of holiday goodies everywhere they turn, their motivation stays high and almost everyone lost weight this week. 

At our meeting yesterday we discussed the possible eating-related perils and pitfalls that can arise during holiday time, and how to deal with them, especially how to cook and bake without nibbling. This had been a problem for many of the women in the past, including Maria.

Maria is a 38 year-old mother of two.  She started dieting at age 20 and since then has tried at least five different diets on more than ten different occasions.  In the past, she’s lost as much as 60 pounds. It took her about eight months to lose this much weight but she started gaining it back within only three months. Since she joined our group, Maria has lost 38 pounds.

 

Maria had a big triumph this week.  Once again she made a cheese tray to bring to a function at her daughter’s school.  Last time she made one (about a month ago), she had the sabotaging thought: “It won’t matter if I just shave off a few pieces while I’m cutting the cheese.” This sabotaging thought led her to eat lots off unplanned pieces. Keeping that experience in mind (a skill learned on Day 13 of The Beck Diet Solution), and remembering how bad she felt last time for giving into her craving, Maria prepared herself in advance with the following thought: “The cheese would taste good but if I eat it, I’ll feel bad.” Therefore, she held strong and didn’t eat even a single piece while she was preparing the tray.  She also did some problem-solving. To eliminate some of the temptation, Maria bought already cut up cheese so she wouldn’t be tempted by cutting it herself.  A few days later, Maria is still thinking about her triumph with the cheese tray and giving herself credit (Day 4).